I love engaging in meaningful conversations with people. For the past two days, three friends of mine brought up the same topic of conversation: college majors and future careers. I have one friend who was told me his parents bombarded him with the “what are you doing with your life” question over the weekend. My second friend ranted to me about how irritated she feels when STEM majors feel superior over and belittle social sciences and the humanities. My third friend brought up a meaningful conversation about how her higher educational goals do not match up with society’s conventional mindsets.
After having these conversations, I realized how much college majors have an impact on a person’s view on life, others and themselves. I decided to write this blogpost because I felt like this issue should be discussed and shared with as many of my friends and peers. I’m a BA environmental studies major. That’s right a BA- Bachelor’s of Arts. I didn’t fail out of Biology. I didn’t choose this major because I wanted to spend less time in the library and more time partying. I chose it because I cared about the natural environment and the importance of sustainability. And if you’re already assuming I’m going to start preaching about how “passion is more important than job security” then keep on reading. I come from a family that believes the only way to be successful is to be:
Luckily for my sisters, the healthcare profession did not only align with my parents' dreams, it was also in their blood and character. They had the loving and empathetic personality, motivation to help people, and interest to treat patients bedside or behind the microscope. For me however, I planned my future according to what my parents believed were the only ways to be successful, even if it didn't correlate to my own personal desires. And for a second their brainwashing abilities actually worked; I wanted to be an engineer. Since I was eight years old, the only thing I dreamt about was graduating from UCLA with a bachelor’s degree in computer science and engineering. I have a project I wrote in 3rd grade that said “I want to be an engineer because I want to make computer chips and computer games.” I didn't have the slights idea of what engineers actually do. As I grew older, I became more passionate about subjects like writing, public relations, community service, planning, environmental studies, international studies and government. My brain always worked best when given an assignment or project that allowed me to be as creative and flexible as possible. I realized that the things I was interested in didn’t align with the medical or scientific field. Deciding what I wanted to do was difficult. Looking back, the only reason it was a complicated process was because my family’s and society’s values had clouded all the options and possibilities that were available for me to explore. My parents told me that no other majors were worth considering because they weren't profitable. Society supported their opinions, and to make it worse, society also said I had to decide what I wanted to do for the rest of my life at eighteen. There was so much pressure to plan out my life without having enough time to explore what I wanted to do with enough comfort and support during the process. I’m not saying that my parents and society are wrong. Factually, STEM majors lead to lucrative careers. I am fully aware that some majors do not lead to guaranteed jobs post graduation. And I acknowledge the fact that I am paying thousands of dollars for my education that I’m going to have to pay back in the future. All of these facts are making myself, my friends and all of the other hundreds of students surrounding me in my lecture halls stressed, anxious and paranoid. I have STEM friends who don’t eat or sleep during the week to get at least a fifty percent on their midterm. I have economics and accounting friends who work tirelessly to make it over the 2.85 GPA requirement that the educational bureaucracy imposes on all of the aspiring CPA’s. I have friends in the humanities who feel incompetent because their peers, their parents and the world around them believe that they are working for a worthless degree that won’t get them anywhere. I’m not an academic advisor here to tell you what path you should and shouldn’t take. I’m here to remind you that there is no "end all be all" road to success. I think the biggest misconception about careers is that there are only a limited number of options. Before stressing out about getting into a major, explore other options. Realize that there are more jobs than your family or society says there are. With my major and additional background experience: I have the potential to become:
I can work for the government, a private organization or firm, a laboratory, or a start-up. And that’s not all. I could go to graduate school and concentrate on public health or public policy or epidemiology. I can take extra prerequisites at community college and apply for nursing school. I can double-major. I can supplement my resume by focusing on job experience over GPA. I can learn practical skills for administrative work or take classes in GIS. What I’m trying to say is that there are many roads that can lead to the same success story. There isn’t a cookie cutter process that has to be followed. You can begin whenever. You can change your mind. Research before assuming. Build a network of people from your discipline and learn that there are different ways to attain your idea of success. If it doesn't work out one way, find another way. Create another way. Even if your educational or career goals don't match up with your parents, remind them that you're a motivated and hardworking person. I don't think our families and friends realize how hard we work and how much we stress out about making sure we have a planned path. We sacrifice sleep and fun. We study more than they think we do. The fact that we're success-hungry already demonstrates just how successful we will be in the future. True success is based on whether or not you are a goal-getter; whether you're willing enough to put in the work, passion and drive in whatever success you're pursuing. Success is different for everyone. It might involve getting into medical or law school. It might mean doing whatever you can to help as many people as possible in other ways- through social work, non-profit, teaching or public health. It might mean developing your own talents- in art, dance, music, writing or photography. Whatever it is, it’s yours and yours alone. It isn’t and shouldn’t be everyone else’s success story. Society continues to regurgitate the same idea that STEM will make you succeed even if it means getting hurt, discouraged, or bored in the process. The world needs an eclectic community that offers a variety of potential and hidden talent. To ALL students- continue to work hard, take care of yourself and be flexible. Figuring out the next step might mean taking a detour or side road, but as long as you focus on what you're doing and letting everyone else navigate their own trek, you’re accomplishing half of your success already.
0 Comments
Over winter break, my cousin recommended that I read And the Mountains Echoed by Khaled Hoesseni. The novel takes place in 20th century Afghanistan and revolves around the relationship between a separated family. There's a quote in the book that particularly stuck out to me:
"But it is important to know this, to know your roots. To know where you started as a person. If not your own life seems unreal to you. Like a puzzle. Like you have missed the beginning of a story and now you are in the middle of it, trying to understand." When I read this quote, I started to think more deeply about my roots. In a previous post, I talked about how it feels like I'm living more than one life. I've moved and evolved and experienced so much in my life it's hard to connect the pieces into one coherent collection of memories; It's convoluted. I know a lot of people who believe life is about creating themselves and disassociating with their past. People move cities or transfer to different schools attempting to be "someone else". Can you really run away from your past? I was raised by my parents who were both immigrants from the Philippines. My generation of siblings and cousins are first-born americans; we were destined to live the American dream even before birth. Growing up Filipino-American was different from growing up in a stereotypical American family. There were no family game nights or dinners asking how everyone's day was going. I wasn't talked to in a more loving or respectful manner when I was being scolded. I felt governed and controlled. The choices I made growing up were products of my parents hopes and desires. How was I supposed to make my family proud and fulfill the model minority stereotype that everyone around me expected me to be. The pressure to succeed and be the person my parents would love and accept induced psychological anxiety in me. I wasn't allowed to fail. This made every small failure growing up feel like my entire life was falling apart. How was I supposed to carry on the traditions of my family while simultaneously adapting to western society? It made the journey of self-discovery even more difficult. There was a point in my life where I didn't want to be Asian. I remember wishing I was caucasian because I was so embarrassed about my roots and the way I grew up. I didn't want to be associated with being good at math or playing the piano. I wasn't good at either. I didn't want to be perceived as docile and quiet. I didn't want weird looks whenever my friends looked inside my refrigerator or heard my parents try to understand the person on the other end of customer service. I tried distancing myself from my culture; I stopped eating the foods and listening to the tagalog music I sang and danced to as a kid. I tried so hard to be someone else. Looking back, I'm ashamed of the process I underwent trying to figure out my identity. To be ashamed about the people and culture that supported me my entire life is one of my only regrets.There was so much time wasted not talking to my parents and opening up to them. So much time wasted not learning the language or the recipes of the food. So much time wasted forgetting how hard my parents and other immigrants work so hard to provide their children with a life equal to their western counterparts, despite starting at a disadvantage. My roots define who I am. If I were to forget everything and everyone that provided the foundation for all of my failures and achievements, I would have lost a fundamental piece of myself. I was taught discipline and hardwork.I was taught the importance of family. I was taught that God and faith came first. Most importantly, I was taught that love wasn't hearing "I love you" every single day. It was "Come home now it's late" and "put on two layers of jackets it's cold" or "don't drive it's raining hard". Even though I never heard the eight letter, three-word phrase every day, I learned to see and appreciate love in some of the smallest gestures and I owe it all to my parents. I belong to a community that values education and good morality; a community that inspires me to continue to work hard and represent a culture that lacks idols in government and the media. I know that my children and children's children won't grow up in the same environment and culture that I did, but I hope to continue the traditions and cultures, and remind them of the roots that sowed the seeds of their fruitful life and bountiful success. Watching TV and reading books is by far one of my favorite ways of passing time. When I'm not binge watching or looking up movie soundtracks and post-film interviews, I find myself day dreaming in lecture about last nights episode or coming up with a number of alternative endings while I drive home from school. Walter Mitty isn't the only person living a secret life.
I love fiction. I love dystopian societies, coming of age plots, melodramatic love stories, and the journey of a hero. I love helping Scott Mccall and his wolf pack take down his next malevolent mythological villain. I love using my mediocre knowledge about law and criminology to help Annalise and the Keating 5 get away with their next murder. I love delving into the unknown, the completely surreal and utterly fascinating spirit realm crafted by Miyazaki. I want the call to adventure and the threshold to my next voyage. I want to climb mountains, face adversity, cross paths, jump off buildings, get hurt, and get back up. I want to resurrect from rock bottom and return home with the elixir of life. I guess the real reason I love movies and shows is because I get to step away from the drama of my own life and be completely absorbed in another. I've become so enthralled with the idea of leaving my monotonous routine and escaping (even if it's for 60 minutes or less) to a world where I can be and do anything. Most of all, I love fiction because the hero always triumphs. Despite any adversity and sudden death, some miraculous intervention rekindles their strength and will, enough to help them complete their conquests. I don't always win. I fail, accomplish a little, and fail a lot more. The race gets hard to run and the waves get stronger. The tides pull me in deeper and I sink a lot quicker. How do I face the demons and shadows in my life; the internal and external conflicts like getting into my major, my self-diagnosed anxiety and broken relationships. Where's my trusted ally and fairy god mother to save me and give me strength? When will I spread my wings and catch myself from a fall or evolve in the midst of chaos. I don't, but my favorite fictional characters always do. I have more confidence and reassurance in their success over my own. Life isn't fiction. That's the reason why we love them. It's the same reason why authors write them. We escape our reality and make a new one that surpasses any boundaries and limitations that we face in our own lives. It's a controlled dream. And while I advocate the importance of dreaming and relaxing, I also realize how detrimental it is to pick the red pill and dive into the rabbit hole. It's escapism. Rather than escaping, be inspired by the trials and tribulations of your favorite heroes. Believe in yourself the way you believe in them. When you look at your life in retrospect, you start to notice all of the failures and successes and how each of those have affected your own heroic journey. We might not have a Sam to our Frodo, but we do have loyal companions and allies. We might not have Dumbledore or Professor X telling us our next best move, but we do have parents, teachers and mentors who are all willing to help support us in our own journeys. Our entire life is a monomyth; a journey not seen or read, but felt and experienced. There's always a point in the quarter when I want to drop everything I'm doing and book the quickest ride back to the Bay Area. I love my little piece of California Paradise,
but there's honestly nothing compared to being surrounded by the urban sub city, my favorite foods and Voss water from my own sink. This weekend, I decided I need to step away from the constant stress associated with school and work, my dirty apartment and ham sandwiches for breakfast lunch and dinner. It was probably the best decision I've made this whole quarter. On Saturday morning, I went to Pismo Beach to celebrate my sister's birthday. I started the day fairly early. Waking up at 6 AM after a night out in Isla Vista was hard, but if you know me well, I can't sacrifice sleep for a good time with good company. After not seeing my sisters since winter break, I was ecstatic to finally hang out.. I cherish my relationship with them, so any opportunity to be with them is one I'm willing to drop any other plans for. My entire Saturday was spent riding ATVs on the Sand Dunes in Pismo, eating at Splash Cafe, and walking down the beach and pier. Believe me when I say I tried the best clam chowder and enjoyed some of the best february weather in my entire life. The rest of my weekend was spent catching up on my version R&R- eating a home cooked meal and catching up on How to Get Away With Murder on my living room couch. This weekend reminded me of how lucky I am to have such amazing family and friends that can make me feel happy without even trying. I don't look forward to returning back to midterms and Mcdonald's, but I am grateful for being able to experience some calm before the storm. Lent is a season of self-examination. I use this liturgical period of the year to reflect on my life, the current values I hold and figure out the steps I need to take to become born again and to become closer to Jesus and his way of life. I'm a sinner. I probably do more sinful things than I realize because of how commonplace it is in society. I'm a moral and ethical person at heart, but vice always seems to triumph over virtue in my life. This year, I'm particulraly focusing on the deadly vice of pride.
I'm not one to brag about my life directly. I don't boast my accomplishments or hold myself on a high pedestal. I do however, indirectly pride myself on the attention I receive from people, something I want to get rid of in my life. To be frank, social media is an outlet where I have the ability to indirectly talk about the cool things that I'm doing, post pictures of places no one else has the opportunity to go, and create a digital life that manifests into something that people might percieve luxurious or unique. I hate it. I hate how I enjoy receiving likes on social media, making other people slightly jealous without it being obvious, and getting jealous when I see other people relishing in a fruitful life that makes me scrutinize my own. For these reasons, I'm giving up social media. Not only because editing photos and coming up with clever captions distracts me from enjoying the present moment. Not only because I'm probably going to do better in school without having to check social media. I'm giving up social media to finally escape the withdrawals I have when I'm away from being occupied in someone else's life other than my own. I'm giving up social media to learn how to love my life without having to make other people feel bad about theirs. According to the First Law of Thermodynamics, energy is neither created or destroyed but is merely transformed. This principle that has now been engraved into my mind courtesy of my environmental energy class, is a principle I can apply to my own lenten transformation. I don't want to destroy any part of me and create a whole new person, I merely hope to manifest my potential energy; I want to catalyze my potential to become a better person. Energy undergoes conversion. Conversion means transforming an old way of living and acting in order to embrace new life in Christ. By the end of the lenten season, I know I will return to using social media. However, I hope I no longer have to rely on it. I want to express myself and inherently know that i am doing it as a form of art rather than self-seeking motives. In the meantime, I will be using my free time updating this blog and make writing part of my daily (probably weekly) routine. |
ryann jeffThoughts, opinions, and Yahoo Answers quality advice ARCHIVES
August 2019
|